Why is lifestyle change such a threat, such an overwhelming and fearful challenge? Why do people feel such a need to keep their options open all the time? Peter Vajda reveals the simple fear that explains why so many people prefer to stress themselves out with excessive commitments rather than close off a single option from amongst the hundreds facing them. Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed by everything you have taken on? Learn how to let go and de-clutter your life.

Why do some people constantly put things off? Most often, something is operating “underneath” their procrastination — some conflicting commitment or fear that explains why they are resisting what they know needs to be done. Peter Vajda takes you through questions that can help you probe beneath the symptom of procrastination to get at the root causes. By staying with your responses and inquiring deeply into them, you can raise your level of awareness about the true nature of your resistance.

Many managers, supervisors and employees have become conflict-averse. The corporate culture demands an environment where all are in agreement, always smiling and saying “yes”. Yet all leaders have a responsibility to foster dissent in the organization, since conflict is the genesis of creativity. It’s also how you get people engaged. No conflict, no passion; all that ‘niceness’ leaves people feeling little or no interest in the outcome.

You can tell folks to change, but making it happen is something else. When employees are treated as functions and roles, attitudes turn negative and the ‘us vs. them’ mindset takes over. There’s often a mental gap between those in charge and those they lead. Managers and supervisors see change as a proactive, ‘creative’ process that they have initiated. Those who are told to change see it mostly from a ‘reactive’ mindset. If you want folks to use their innate talents, wisdom and knowledge to make changes work, ask, don’t tell.

Betrayal and mistrust are rampant in the corporate world of today. To be conscious, you need to view life, right here and right now, from the 25,000-foot level and ask yourself: “What am I doing right here, right now?” Consciousness is about being decent right where you are. That’s who successful and truly respected leaders and managers are. Let your consciousness tug on your sleeve as you reflect on these questions.

Does your leading, managing and supervising performance and behavior provide cause for celebration on this Fourth of July? Here’s a not-quite-lighthearted quiz from Peter Vajda to help you find out.

To be an effective leader, you need to support people to engage in reducing the negative effects of workplace conflict. Focusing on the ‘technical’ alone won’t do it — never has, never will. What’s required is ‘Knowing thyself’ — an in-depth understanding of ‘who I am’ and ‘how I am’, derived from consistent and conscious reflection on your experiences and the lessons learned (including the good, the bad and the ugly). Where the majority of employees are not self-aware, workplace conflict may well be insidious, toxic, all-pervasive and destructive.

One of the most frustrating and irritating experiences at work is the endless talk, conversation and sharing of thoughts that takes place and leads to nowhere. That’s all many meetings consist of: moving the existing ‘mental furniture’ around. There’s nothing new because the door stays closed. Nothing comes in. Nothing gets out. Only the arrangement of the furniture changes. So why doesn’t anyone open the door?

When someone’s committed, it shows in the way they care and how deeply they are engaged — even at work. Explore the elements of healthy, conscious commitment and reflect on why some people show a limited ability to commit to anything — leaving them unhappy, frustrated and denied a sense of meaning in their lives. Then ask yourself the key questions that will help you establish a deeper sense of commitment to, and engagement in, what you do at work, at home and at play.

We live in a world of duality: love versus fear, right versus wrong, negative or positive and so on. Maybe that’s why one of the qualities of a ‘mature individual’ is the ability to hold and reflect upon both polarities at the same time. Many refer to this as enlightening state where you do not have to opt for one over the other, but can entertain both polarities, with curiosity and without judgment. Here are some ways of learning from the dualities in your life and how you react to them.